A couple of weeks ago I announced that my wee e-book would be out soon and so here it is:
My pregnancy and motherhood diary written as letters and poems because there is nothing more beautiful than:
- the art of writing letters. Not emails or tweets or text messages but filling a plain sheet of paper with scribbles and doodles and whatever else you may want to put in a letter.
- poetry– poems often stay with me for a very long time after I have read them and words and images haunt me like friendly ghosts.
In Letters to Peanut I wanted to catch the emotions that come with first discovering that you are going to become a parent in nine months and then with grappling with sleepless nights, leaking bras and the first twelve months of being a mother (as well as the occasional panicked feeling of ‘Is this for real? I’m actually allowed to be responsible for another human being?)
But it is not all panic! There are times of immense joy that I would love to share with you. The first scan, steps and that first time Peanut made it clear that a chip off the floor was a delicacy worth three Michelin stars unlike anything I cooked.
Here is one of my favourite haiku poems from the book. I wrote it during long and sleepless nights when the whole world seemed to be fast asleep apart from me, Peanut and a curious fox:
together we learn
the night language of foxes
And for the book romantics out there – print copies will be available in a couple of weeks (formatting takes a bit longer).
This is my very special and magic moment – introducing Letters to Peanut to you and it is FREE for you to download until Saturday 9 November!
I will also be sharing my experience of self-publishing over the next few months so watch this space.
P.S. I would love to also thank everyone for the amazing support so far. And a big hug to Helen Braid – a very talented and patient cover designer.
I am linking my doodle to the fabulous Story of Mum website and the Big Draw Campaign.
This is the last week of my holiday and last postcard from me. My poem summarises it all:
to carry emotional baggage
from consuming all that cabbage.
I’ve got a secret that makes me happy:
mummy will pay
when she smells my nappy!
This week is all about language. Your first words that sound more and more ‘real’ and less like baby babble (which I find very adorable by the way).
Everyday we listen to you commenting on the food and demanding Unidentified Forbidden Objects. You get frustrated when we don’t understand what you want – sorry wee man. Sometimes we get it wrong.
You are growing up surrounded by two cultures and languages and I joke that you will be phonetically confused for a while. On one end of the spectrum – the pesky English sounds of th and ph. On the other end – Polish surging sz, cz and szcz as in szczcescie (luck in Polish).
I may be biased but your little voice is the cutest I have ever heard (even when you throw a tantrum – see below).
zis, yis, ahmam
your first words
busy swallows in your mouth
torrential tears, furrowed face
furious frog on the floor
my No – your sprawl
my keys, my phone, my time
my toast, my drink, my love
Dat is for what’s yours is mine
‘Go out. You’ll get square eyes from all that reading,’ was a mantra I heard throughout my childhood mainly because my idea of having a great time wasn’t to cause trouble (ok, sometimes it was but only when it involved climbing trees and crawling through my wild meadow pretending I was a spy) or to play with Barbie dolls (that I didn’t own anyway) but to hide in a quiet corner with a book and disappear into fantastic worlds, make friends and embark on great adventures.
My books have always been my closest friends and they made me the person I am today.
The kind of person who will happily go home to read if she gets bored at a party. Or, at said party, hide in a corner with a copy of 1984.
The kind of person who would rather write her blog than go shopping.
And the person whose handbag weighs a tonne as there are at least two or three emergency books in there. Just in case Armageddon kicks in and I am stranded in a post-Apocalyptic world full of lizards running the show. I don’t mind as long as I have something to read.
All throughout my adult life my books have been my morning cigarettes and my nightcaps.
I am what I read.
Inspired by Desert Island Discs and the recent literary edition of Stylist I have compiled a list of my own Desert Island Tomes.
It wasn’t an easy choice, the list could stretch into infinity and back, so here are those very important books that shaped my life:
- Emily Series by Lucy Maud Montgomery (Emily of New Moon, Emily Climbs, Emily’s Quest) – Emily Starr was my closest friend when I was a child. A little girl brought up by her aunts dreaming about being a writer and one day achieving that dream. She was the one who made me believe that writing can be a way of life, a vocation that I could and should pursue. I used to go for long walks with my shaggy dog Gapcio and have long discussions with Emily, dreaming up new lives, plots and tribulations, drawing to myself an odd look here and there. (more…)